Potty Training Woes

Published by admin under In The Begining on June 11, 2009

I am writing this so you can learn from my mistakes haha. Apparently we’ve done everything wrong because after after a year….yes a year…of potty training my child still does her business in a diaper. I think there is a common misconception that girls are easier to potty train or I am just not skilled in the area of teaching a child to us the lavatory. We started potty training Vera at 18 months when it was recommend by the pediatrician, and other online resources. We went and got a cute little potty chair with a frog on the front, and we made a huge deal about it so that Vera knew it was important. We introduced it to her by sitting her on it in the morning,before bath,after nap, and before bed. Nothing would happen. She would sit there and play with a toy looking at us like “this is retarded”. Then we started asking “Do you have to go potty”. To this, her reply has always been “No”. Then she would just go in her pants anyways. She doesn’t make faces or hide in corners like most kids. She’s got skills….she must just go as she’s walking around haha. That is about when I decided to introduce rewards because she would strip down and get completely naked (one time even taking a crap on the floor to my dismay). I got some mini M&M’s, and printed out a potty chart. That only cultivated a phobia of not being on the potty when she goes .After sitting there with her for 20 minutes and nothing was happening we’d try and take her off the toilet she would cry, and through a huge fit all while having a nervous breakdown clutching the lid of the toilet. After that we relaxed a little, and she seemed to be doing ok going to the potty once or twice a day when we would take her in there. I’m not precisely sure what happened, but now she’s afraid of the toilet. She throws a fit when I sit her on it regularly, and it’s a battle just to keep her on there. She also is continuing to get ‘nakey’. We tried pull-ups that advertised that they let the child know when they are wet. We also tried using the extra absorbent big kid undies. That was a waste of time because we had to wash all 8 in one day. The wetness didn’t seem to bother her at all, and it made quite a mess for me to pick up. I must say on Vera’s behalf though that she does go to the potty when we are out in public. I am suspicious of why though. It seems she just wants to see what the bathroom looks like, and she enjoys the echos that she can make in the Wal-Mart restrooms. I hate public restrooms so I often cringe when she says the words “Potty” while we are out.
Now Matthew has even started letting her know his disappointment by telling her it’s yucky and that it’s bad. He’s taken a “No more Mr. Nice Guy” stance. However I think that does nothing except hurt her feelings. I tried it this morning, and she said “Sorry, Mommy, Sorry” with her sad big brown eyes and the pouty lip. I think that is what lead up to this morning’s “NO, NO”. That is really what pushed me over the edge in irritation with this whole potty training business. This morning after nursing Naomi I went to check on her because she was being awfully quiet in her room. I don’t know why I was so surprised, but she had dumped out all her toys in her toy bin, got naked, and peed in it!! Like WTF kid that is what a toilet is for haha. Seriously….like that is what we’ve been prepping you for a year now to do in the TOILET, not your toy bin. I don’t know what to do. I’ve tried everything. I’ve Google searched the crap out of toilet training, and no one is saying anything I haven’t tried before. I’m afraid now that we may have started too early and it’ll be 4 before she’s toilet trained 0_0. I’m starting to believe more and more that everything we say or do is a seed, and we sow it later. I use to be one of those childless women who would make remarks like “My children won’t ever…..”. You know the type. Now it’s like insert foot in mouth. I always thought I’d have my kids out of diapers by two, and we are now going on three. HELP….please.